Exploring Naples in Florida

If you ever find yourself wondering where all the people with sensible haircuts and ironed linen trousers go to retire, look no further than Naples, Florida. Yes you heard correct, Naples in Florida - Not the South of Italy. It is a place so impeccably manicured that even the palm trees look like they have had a professional blowout. Nestled on the Gulf of Mexico, this sun-drenched pocket of the Paradise Coast is a masterclass in "leisurely living," a phrase that here translates to "moving at the speed of a sunbathing turtle."

Start your journey at the Naples Pier. While nature occasionally decides to redecorate it via a hurricane, the area remains the spiritual heart of the city. Walking onto the sand here feels like stepping onto a giant pile of powdered sugar, though I wouldn’t recommend tasting it unless you enjoy a gritty afternoon snack. If you stand still long enough, you are almost guaranteed to spot a dolphin or two showing off in the surf, likely mocking the tourists who are struggling to set up their designer beach umbrellas.

For a bit of "Old Florida" charm that has not been polished into a high-gloss finish, head over to Tin City. It was once a hub for oyster processing but now serves as a vibrant waterfront marketplace. It is the perfect spot to buy a nautical-themed souvenir you definitely do not need or to grab a basket of fried seafood while watching the boats drift by on the Gordon River.

If your wallet is feeling particularly heavy, a stroll down Fifth Avenue South will quickly fix that. It is the kind of street where the cars cost more than my first three houses combined and the window displays are so beautiful they make you feel slightly underdressed for simply existing. I spent a good twenty minutes contemplating a linen shirt before remembering that I spill coffee on myself far too often to own anything that white.

For those who prefer leaves to luxury, the Naples Botanical Garden is a genuine marvel. It is ninety acres of tropical bliss that makes my own attempts at gardening look like a crime scene. Afterward, if you really want to see the "wild" side of the state, take a drive to the Corkscrew Swamp Sanctuary. Walking the 2.25-mile boardwalk through ancient cypress trees is humbling, though keep your eyes peeled for alligators. They are the true locals here, and they have zero interest in your linen trousers or your golf handicap. Naples is a peculiar, beautiful, and deeply relaxing bubble, and once you settle into its rhythm, you might find it very hard to leave.